Hello there, dear readers. I've got some money in my pocket and thought I'd spend it on someting lasting, not just another alcohol induced state of mind. Hockey may be confined to the back seat in this country, the likes of Paisley Pirates are no match for your swedish teams, but I still like to see a good bout on the ice.

I found what's called the "4 ft whirlwind air hockey-game" at Tesco and it only costs a mere 99 quid. I'll take a trip to Barrhead road first thing tomorrow and get myself a piece of children's pass time. I sit around doing sweet fuck all, I have gaps to fill and things I want to do, not just sit on my arse all day doing nothing.

Now I'll soon actually have something to offer people who step over my threshhold. Not just a swig of Caledonian ale, we can duke it out in my livingroom, all in the comfort of my home. Whenever I skulk around outside the bill is all too keen to lift me, now I can stay in the comfort of my own house enjoying myself. And just think of all the money I'll save bying tote bags of lager instead of forking it over to greedy pubowners.

I'll soon have a brand new hobby and I'm so exited.

Cheers from Calum Stewart